One of the biggest parts of helping defend against the counteroffer is what happens when the candidate gives notice. The way that I see it, if you can discourage an employer from even giving the candidate a counter, there's no way the candidate will accept one.

Giving notice can be the most emotional time for a candidate. The pressure that the current employer may put on someone, as well as second-guessing by the candidate, may take a toll.

The easier that you can make this, and the more that you can reduce stress for the candidate, the better. Here's what I tell candidates:

"I'm not concerned that you will accept a counteroffer (you don't want the candidate to think that you don't trust them). I just want to make this transition as painless as possible. The way that we do this is through the process of giving notice.

The best advice that I can give you is to be very brief when you give notice. If it were me, I'd say, 'I have accepted another position outside the company. My start date is _____________, so I'm happy to work out my two weeks' notice. Under no conditions will I accept a counteroffer.'

You do not have to tell your current employer where you are going or what the job is. I strongly suggest that you do not give them any clue about your new compensation package. They will ask you a hundred questions; you do not have to answer a single one. All that's important is that you are leaving. You don't want to burn any bridges, so I'd just say that your new employer has asked you to keep this information confidential. Just have a matter-of-fact style and appreciate why they want to know this information (so they can use it to counteroffer you). The less information you give them, the easier this will be.

When talking to your current employer, you can add positive things such as, 'I have had a wonderful experience at this company, and am happy to have had the opportunity to work with you, but the time has come for me to move on.' But be firm. If you show any kind of weakness or uncertainty in your voice or actions, your current employer will smell it. Most managers have been professionally trained on how to counteroffer employees.

Your boss is going to be shocked that you have accepted another position and that you are leaving. The first thing that will go through your boss' mind is how your leaving will have an impact on him or her. He or she may have to work more hours until a replacement is found; your leaving will lower the morale of the rest of the staff, and your boss may have an extremely difficult time finding someone with your qualifications to replace you. It is much easier and cheaper for your company and boss to try to keep you rather than losing you (especially if it's to a competitor).

Expect your boss' boss to get involved as well. Don't be surprised if both offer to take you out to lunch or dinner. They are going to give you all the attention in the world. Expect a counteroffer. Most counteroffers that I have seen have been anywhere from a 20% to 35% increase in earnings. Enticing, isn't it? But why weren't you worth that much to them yesterday? Does it take you leaving to get something you should have been getting anyway? If so, is that the type of company you want to work for? Keep in mind that counteroffers come in many other forms than just an increase in compensation. Promotions are also ways for getting employees to stay.

Once you give notice, you are essentially breaking a trust that you had with your employer. If you are countered and stay, your company may feel that it owns you. You will be known as the one who caused your employer grief by threatening to quit. You'll no longer be known as a loyal employee. Will this cause your boss to pass you over on the next possible promotion? I've heard of stories where companies only counter to get the employee to stay until they find a replacement and then let the employee go. Some companies feel that it's better for people to leave on their terms instead of their employees' terms.

I promise you that in any research you do on counteroffers, you will not find anything that ever says, 'Take the counteroffer.' Please research this on your own, and if you do happen to find anything to the contrary, please let me know."

I write candidates' notice letters for them. I ask for their boss' names and draft the documents. I also send them published articles written about counteroffers and research on what happens with employees who decide to stay.

The whole purpose of this is to get candidates to understand what will happen. If you prepare them to expect the counteroffer and how it will happen, the candidates will have a heads-up on how to handle it.